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John J. IN MEMORY OF John J. Ford, October 4, 1943 - April 21, 2009. As John's wife, in my grief, sadness and disbelief a year ago, I failed to celebrate the life of my husband who loved life, had an insatiable curiosity, and more courage than anyone will know. He was not a perfect man, but was perfect for me. I respected and admired him - kind, generous, forgiving, quiet, gentle, and thoughtful in the best sense of the word, with a sometimes wicked and wry sense of humor. When anyone talked to him, he listened in a way that you knew you were the total focus of his attention. He was a complex man - non-judgmental, yet opinionated and never wavering in his convictions, but open-minded enough to consider new ideas. He loved rock music of the 70s, country and western in the 80s, and all types of symphony music, especially the John Philip Sousa marches. The calendar is now my enemy - it takes me further away from the simple gesture of holding his hand every day that passes. In my seemingly endless search for meaning in my loss, there is the gradual lessening of the feeling of overwhelming pain when I re-remember he is gone after I've occasionally completely focused on something for a while, and my mind mercifully allows me to forget for a few moments - then the gasp and loss of breath that always comes with the reality. John was born in Memphis, Tennessee, the oldest of four children, while his father was in the U.S. Army. Eventually his family settled in Conshohocken, Pennsylvania where John graduated from St. Matthew High School in 1961, where he played first chair violin. He then attended and graduated from Villanova University in 1965 where he was a member of the Villanova Singers. He continued his education with a Masters Degree from the University of Illinois in Urbana in 1969. His diversity of interests led him to an A.S. degree from Tampa College in Computer and Electronics Technology in 1989. From 1970 to 1975 he was the Personnel Administrative Officer for Employment Relations for the State of Wisconsin, which began his career in employment discrimination and fair employment practice. In 1975 he became Research Analyst/Paralegal Specialist for the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission at the Denver Litigation Center and later in the Dallas District office Legal Unit and regularly testified in court cases as a statistical expert. After leaving government service in 1988 he pursued a variety of employment opportunities, from authoring a computer user's manual for a scanner-based inventory control database system, tax preparation and accounting, and helping with a small family business. In 1997 he moved to Albuquerque and eventually returned to government work as the manager of the Kirtland AFB VITA tax program. He was also posthumously awarded with an Outstanding Civilian Career Service Award from the Department of the Air Force. Though his heart condition slowed him down a bit, he outlasted his doctor's dire prognosis by approximately 8 years and rarely missed a day of work. He was preceded in death by his parents, John and Clair (Unruh) Ford; and brother-in-law Tom Connors. He was also preceded in death by his father-in-law and mother-in-law, Modesto Sanchez and Mary (Gurule) Sanchez; his sister-in-law, Tina Peralta, brother-in-law Alex Peralta; and brother-in-law David Sicotte. He is survived by his wife, Eileen Sanchez; his brother Michael J. Ford and wife Patricia; sisters, Barbara Clair McIlvaine and husband Donald, Kathleen Ann Connors; and numerous nieces and nephews. He is also survived by his sisters-in-law, Gloria Stanley and husband Lee, Becky Luna and husband Albert, Barbara Sicotte, Pat Fernandez and husband Richard. I would like to thank all of those who helped me through this past year, the kind people at Daniels Funeral Home on Carlisle; my sisters; nieces and nephews - for their time, thoughts, prayers and actions; John's sisters and brother for their support, the people from Kirtland AFB that John worked with and that sent me the most beautiful cards, tributes and sentiments, active duty, civilians and volunteers, and those friends that I saw or spoke with almost every day, who listened to me with patience and compassion, and attempted to help me plant the seedlings of a future without my husband, who was my best friend and sounding board and who knew me better than anyone in this world and still loved me. A quote from a book John carried with him wherever he lived for over 30 years, from The Prophet, the chapter On Joy and Sorrow, by Kahlil Gibran. "When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight."
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